My 35 year old cousin Kelly passed away last week on Monday after a long battle with cancer. She has 3 beautiful young children and was truly taken from her family too soon. Her passing has made me think so much about life, death, family, and the legacy that I want to leave. It broke my heart to see her kids say goodbye to their mommy. What were things like the last few weeks when the hope had diminished that things would get better? How do you possibly let go of your children? I can't even imagine how strong she had to be to hug her children and let them go not knowing if she would ever be able to hold them again. I don't know how strong I could be. Her oldest daughter read a poem at the funeral and did a wonderful job. I know her mommy was watching her and was so proud of her for doing this.
So many questions that can never be answered or understood. Things like this just seem so unfair. She still had so much ahead of her. I think we just need to take comfort in the fact that it is ok to not understand. It is ok to question God. It's even ok to be mad at Him. He can take it. In fact, I have a feeling He kind of expects it. The important thing is that while you can be mad, it's important to trust Him - knowing that we could never possibly understand why.
Anyway, on my way home from work this evening this song came on the radio. I have heard it a hundred times, but today it meant something different. Is Kelly really up in Heaven, smiling down on us saying "Don't worry about me."? I think she is. God bless Kelly and her family.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O8sWwFIFlK8
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I am so sorry for your loss. It absolutely makes my heart ache thinking about this situation. I can not imagine how one gets through something like this. You and your family are in my prayers. Your song is very fitting.
I pray for your family. What a tough time her children are going through. Aaron and I love that song. It brings us a lot of peace.
Carrie, Gary and I both read your heartfelt words and cried throughout the song.
Little Brooke, who is 6, had a dream the night after her mommy went to Heaven. Brooke said she dreamed she was in the back seat of the car and she didn't know who was driving but her mommy was on the passenger side. She said her mommy had blonde streaks in her hair (Kelly had no blonde streaks!). Brooke said her mommy turned and looked back at her and said, "Don't worry, I'm okay." The dream must have been very vivid to little Brooke as she has repeated several times and she always says "mommy had blond steaks in her hair."
Kelly's children were her life. They loved her and she loved them even more. She will always shine through them. I would say to everyone, cherish your children. No matter if they're babies or 35 as was Kelly, they will always your babies.
We are still wondering "why" and our hearts have a hole which may never heal. We know that although we may never hold Kelly in our arms again, God had his wrapped around her as she left us. And oh, what an impact she made on so many lives. That beautiful smile! It's unbelievable how many people remember her for that smile!
Thank you Carrie for being there for us.
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